Welcome ladies and gentlemen as we join together as disenfranchised music fans to commiserate, contemplate, and at times downright mock the spectacle that will transpire in front of our very eyes at the 57th Grammy Awards, while not completely dismissing the idea of giving credit when something of merit occurs, or recognizing someone worthy of recognition when they actually get recognized. So get your refreshing fingers ready, feel free to pipe up in the comments section below if you feel so inclined, and let’s have a fair fight.
For a preview of what to expect during the show, click on the link below.
All times Central time.
10:45 – Definitely a strange year for the Grammy Awards from the country music perspective. There just wasn’t much country music to be had, two of the performances were butt up together and truncated, and Miranda Lambert was sort of a let down. The night started off with a strange vibe when Sturgill Simpson got shut out for a Grammy opportunity, but there’s always next year. Big night for Sam Smith. And a big night for Beck, which seems to be some justice for real music. Overall, it was a night of sedated performances attempting to reach for spiritual moments, aside from Madonna who struck the exact opposite in a blatant cry for attention. As always the Grammy Awards afford an interesting paradox or rewarding talent, while seeming to let commercial interests weigh too much into the decisions. Sam Smith is this year’s Adele, and an American music institution is once again dominated by a Brit. Something tells me this was an off year for the Grammys in the vacuum of no real meaningful trends or superstars emerging in music. Next year will be different.
10:37 – Welp folks, that’s it. I’ll compose some final thoughts, and get out of here. THANK YOU for following along, commenting, liking, tweeting, reposting etc. etc.
10:33 – John Legend and Common carrying on the theme of the night of spirituals and Gospel tunes replacing bubblegum pop and big production performances. No “Shake It Off.” No “All About That Bass.” Instead we get non-commercial songs focused more on emphasizing artists and their talents instead of driving iTunes sales for the coming days.
10:29 – Beyonce starts off the final performance slot, performing a gospel number, all in white, and singing from the soul like few other singers in country or anywhere else can.
10:25 – Pharell next to dancing Taylor Swift, recommended by Markf in the comments section.
10:20 – Grammys paying tribute to fallen country stars including “Little” Jimmy Dickens, Bob Montgomery, George Hamilton IV, and others that the CMA’s and ACM’s don’t even acknowledge.
10:16 – All these assholes in the crowd talking over this very important presentation about trying to keep music monetized.
10:15 – That’s the problem with money Taylor Swift, you can always have more of it. But at what cost? You could have kept writing songs by yourself and walk away from nights like this with hardware.
10:09 – Taylor Swift was all “Just read the damn winner” as Jamie Foxx and Stevie Wonder were doing their blind bit. Maybe Max Martin will let her touch her Grammy after he screwed up her career.
10:07 – The Grammy for Record of the Year goes to Sam Smith for “Stay With Me.”
10:03 – I enjoyed Beck’s “Morning Phase” just fine, but just like this song, it was mostly textures.
10:01 – Dave Grohl giving well-deserved credit to David Letterman to his service to music over the years.
10:00 – Ha! Seeing a lot of folks on Twitter thinking it was over. We still got 30 more minutes folks!
9:58 – An emerging thread to tonight: Taylor Swift goes pop, eliminating her from getting any country awards, and now she’s not getting any pop/mainstream awards either. One of the most decorated artists of this generation, and she’s come up empty now on multiple shows. Keep counting that money, because that’s all that’s left.
9:56 – Yes, Roger Miller! Too bad it’s on a freaking commercial.
9:55 – Hey Grammy Awards, let these people freaking speak, especially for these top awards! This is one of the biggest moments in their lives, and you’re not allowing them to say anything. LAME!
9:54 – The Grammy for Song of the Year goes to Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me.”
9:53 – Yes, the music Antichrist Max Martin won Producer of the Year, so that’s another thing to be disappointed with.
9:52 – I have no idea what the fuck is going on right now. Is there an artist tied to this “performance”? Is this “Sia”? I’m all for the abstract, but that was all just sort of creepy.
9:50 – How did I all of a sudden get transported into a French art film?
9:46 – Prince all…
9:45 – 90% of the sheep at home have no idea who Beck is.
9:44 – And what happened with Katy Perry’s hair? It went from sheer straight black to looking like something you’d eat on a stick at a Mexican carnival.
9:42 – They don’t wait until the end of the show to give away the biggest award?
9:41 – I called it bitches, check below. A Dark Horse emerges.
9:40 – The Grammy for Album of the Year goes to Beck for “Morning Phase.”
9:39 – Prince makes a surprise appearance in an orange outfit, and the crowd goes crazy.
9:38 – What will be around longer, this Juanes dude, Johnny Manziel’s football career, or Bruce Jenner’s penis?
9:36 – Juanes is very very average Latin music. Why is this on my television? So much talent down there, this guy is completely nondescript.
9:30 – Sam Smith looks like the sound of an 80’s one hit wonder.
9:26 – Ugh. Another hour of this stuff. Someone make dinner for me.
9:23 – As cool as it is to see McCartney getting face time with big current stars, this song and performance does absolutely nothing for me. And you could fit two Hillary Clintons in Rahooney’s pant suit.
9:20 – Excellent, understated performance by Dwight Yoakam and Brandy Clark. Every country performer would kill to have Dwight singing harmony for them. Word is they “bonded” on the Eric Church tour they both opened on, so I guess it’s somewhat appropriate they follow Chief. Still, wish they had a little more time, and a higher profile spot. Three country performances, and one was rock, and the two other were back to back.
9:18 – Oh come on, you put Brandy Clark and Dwight Yoakam on the other stage?!?
9:16 – Seriously, “Give Me Back My Hometown” is a pretty good song from Eric Church or anyone, and I’m glad he chose it compared to some of the other choices he could have made. Also it’s appropriate because it was up for Best Country Song.
9:15 – Pizza Hut! Woot woot!
9:15 – …but Eric Church is better than Bro-Country, does right by his fans, books cool openers on tour (qualifier, qualifier, etc. etc.)
9:14 – Don’t be so insensitive people! Eric Church doesn’t wear sunglasses because he thinks he’s so cool, he actually has a medical condition ….. called raging narcissistic assholia.
9:10 – Real picture from the Grammy Awards, courtesy of Ryan Adams.
9:07 – Stevie Wonder is lucky as hell he didn’t have to see that Madonna performance tonight like the rest of us.
9:04 – Watching performances from Usher, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, even Kanye West, and comparing them most country awards performances, you can clearly see country doesn’t get that it’s the era of the song and the performance. Leave your lasers, explosions, and legions of backup dancers for your stadium shows.
9:01 – George Wein really is the man. Good to see him getting some recognition. Remember it was at the Newport Folk Festival where Kris Kristofferson and many more were broken.
9:00 – Tony Bennett – The only older performer the entire night that hasn’t had “work.” Props to him for that.
8:59 – Poor Gaga, she’s fallen on such hard times, not only can’t she not afford to be delivered to the Grammys in an egg, she has to roll in Cheetos to sport a tan.
8:58 – The only way Tony Bennett would agree to work with Lady Gaga is if she stopped projectile vomiting on him.
8:56 – A lot of support on Twitter to say Katy Perry was channeling Princess Leia. But without the buns, I can’t go there.
8:54 – As we speak, Tom Petty is sitting back, stroking his goatee slowly, and pondering who he’ll sue next for ripping off one of his songs. “Enie menie miney mo, that sure sounds like something from “Damn The Torpedoes.”
8:50 – Nonetheless, can find too much fault in the performance, or the presentation. Where was this at the Super Bowl?
8:49 – The problem with Katy Perry trying to deliver a heartfelt performance is that this time last week she was flying around a stadium with sparks shooting out her ass and dancing with Sesame Street-style sharks.
8:45 – President Obama gives a speech on domestic violence, and then a abuse survivor tells her story. I think we’re getting a similar moment to last year’s mass marriage.
8:41 – Back to Miranda Lambert winning Best Country Album: Painfully, painfully predictable. At the Oscars in a few weeks, they’ll be highlighting the best achievements in the medium. In music, and specifically country, we shine a spotlight on the “just okay” because we think it will score the widest appeal. That’s what the ACM’s are for. The Grammy Awards should have more dignity.
8:37 – Yes, Pharell is dressed funny. No dignity going after the low hanging fruit.
8:36 – Whoa, Jackie Chan on the ivories! You’re hired!
8:34 – And Sturgill couldn’t even pull off the “Best Americana Album” award.
8:33 – On the Billboard Top Country Albums chart, Sturgill Simpson’s Metamodern Sounds is at #8, Eric Church’s The Outsiders is at #9, Miranda Lambert’s Platinum is at #10, and the rest aren’t even in the Top 25.
8:33 – Right now Sturgill Simpson’s album is charting better at #8 than any of the Grammy’s “Best Country Album” nominees.
8:32 – The Grammy for Best Country Album goes to Miranda Lambert’s “Platinum.”
8:30 – Damn Annie, one more time, but with feeling.
8:29 – Annie Lennox is as ever-present on these award shows as Sheryl Crow. But she can bring it.
8:25 – The only Hozier’s I know are all from Canada, but I’m finding it hard to be offended by this performance beyond homeboy’s sparkly guitar.
8:18 – Gwen, what happened to that ska punk princess I had the hots for in ’95? You’ve been worked over into a reality show plastic star.
8:16 – 100% chance Gwen Stefani is lip syncing.
8:14 – So far the rock performers are outclassing everyone else. A guitar, a microphone, a true sentiment, and no need for lights, explosions, or legions of demon dancers.
8:11 – Was never a huge ELO fan, but Jeff Lynne may be one of the most unheralded architects of American music. A Traveling Wilbury, and the secret ingredient behind Tom Petty’s success.
8:09 – John Mayer can play guitar, but the sales associate at Guitar Center shouldn’t have allowed him to walk out of the girls section with that weak axe. Fender, get on a sponsorship.
8:07 – Don’t know much about Ed Sheeran’s music, but every time I’ve seen him, he seems like an affable, organic performer and songwriter. Not opposed to seeing him be on the good end of further success. As usual, the Brits outclass most of the pop stars from The States.
8:04 – The Grammy for Best R&B Performance goes to Beyonce.
8:03 – Now to the awards I don’t care about even if I try.
7:58 – To expound a little bit more on the Miranda Lambert performance, it’s nights like these where country music has the opportunity to sell its virtues to the rest of the world. When they see a performance like Miranda’s, they just wonder what the hell is going on with the genre. Miranda has some great songs she could have showcased.
7:57 – Glad Beck won for the record.
7:56 – Beck looks like a traveling elementary school puppeteer these days. My theory that he could have a big night is in tact.
7:54 – The Grammy for Best Rock Album goes to Beck for “Morning Phase.”
7:53 – Even Bacchus is like “Madonna, please. Close your legs.”
7:53 – Some things you just can’t unsee. This is just … wrong.
7:50 – I’m far from a prude, but what’s up with all the Satan imagery Madonna? Jesus.
7:48 – Madonna. You’re a grandmother.
7:45 – Nice. So Kanye has the Auto-Tune turned so high he’s not even trying to hide it. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to hear it as a vocal effect, or if he can’t hit pitch for shit.
7:42 – Just a warning folks, getting so much damn traffic the server might crash… Hold on out there.
7:38 – Sam Smith wins the Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album. Looks like it’s going to be Sam Smith’s night.
7:36 – Not a mIranda hater, but I would have preferred she do something with more heart. Worst performance of the night so far, and it’s from a country woman. Good job country.
7:35 – Miranda says “shit,” and the censors bleep out about 12 seconds of the song. Ha! Got to give Miranda credit for going for it!
7:34 – Yes, the turbine backdrop is appropriate for this Miranda Lambert performance, because this blows. (har har)
7:33 – One of only three “country” performances in these 3 1/2 hours … and it’s a rock song.
7:32 – Miranda calls it an “Attitude song.” “They can get old if you don’t do ‘em right,” she says. “I don’t want to keep doing the same type of attitude song, I’ve got to change them up.”
7:30 – So apparently Miranda is coming up. She’s doing her current single “Little Red Wagon” says Saving Country Music’s super secret inside sources.
7:26 The Grammy for Best Pop Solo Performance goes to “Happy” by by the curiously-hatless Pharrell.
7:24 – So far the performances have been pleasantly tolerable. Hopefully we can keep it up.
7:21 – Not sure why Tom Jones is looking like Fredrick Douglas these days, but his voice hasn’t aged a bit.
7:18 – Ariana Grande is lip-syncing. 100% sure. My sure fire lip-sync alarms are going crazy.
7:18 – Say what you want, but Ariana Grande was the tastiest $4.25 I ever spent at Starbucks.
7:16 – Also interesting to see the Grammys give out an award so early, and to blow their “Here’s Taylor Swift” wad. Usually we’d be watching so godawful pop performance right now.
7:14 – Would have been great to see Brandy Clark win Best New Artist, but let’s get serious. It was great that she just got nominated. It was Sam Smith’s running away. Only problem with it is he’s probably going to win a ton of other awards, and that recognition could have gone to someone else. It’s making up to be Sam Smith’s night.
7:12 – Just sayin’ Sam Smith…
7:11 – Taylor Swift hands out the Grammy for Best New Artist to Sam Smith
7:05 – Not gonna lie. The pissed off, socially-awkward 14-year-old boy in me is loving this. Real music made by real people with real instruments. Soak it up while we can.
7:04 – Didn’t the AC/DC drummer contract someone to kill somebody down in the land where the ‘roo and the wallaby roam? How about spending that dough on a new producer to make music that sounds difference for a change?
7:02 – AC/DC is a band I would have loved to see on the Grammy Awards, until they became a band that you would see on The Grammy Awards.
7:00 – And here we go!
6:58 – Just remember, no matter what happens, Hank Williams, Colin Escott, Glen Campbell, Rosanne Cash, Jerry Douglas, and The Louvin Brothers, and “Weird” Al have all already been awarded Grammys.
6:56 – Late breaking prediction: Beck comes in as the Album of the Year winner from the Dark Horse position in a depleted field.
6:48 – Alright, I’m a little ball of hate after the Sturgill Simpson loss and ready to do this.
6:00 – Nothing but respect to Rosanne Cash. But the fact that she gets all three Americana awards is the reason Americana is Americana…and will always be Americana, and just Americana. I thought Americana did an excellent job instilling some more youth into their presentation for the 2014 Americana Music Awards, but they are never going to grow their own stars, or support the ones coming up if they don’t figure out how to honor the present and future just as much as the past. Recognizing Sturgill Simpson this year, and Jason Isbell last year would have been a way to bridge these past greats like Rosanne Cash with the new blood coming into the sub-genre, and support both to a greater degree. Otherwise, the talent goes elsewhere to find greener pastures. “The River & The Thread” was an excellent album and deserves all the accolades it was awarded tonight.
5:57 – Old Crow Medicine Show wins Best Folk Album for “Remedy.”
5:55 – Rosanne Cash wins big in the Americana categories. She walks away with Best American Roots Performance, Best American Roots Song, and Best Americana Album.
Sturgill Simpson is beat out by Rosanne Cash for Best Americana Album.
“The last time I won a Grammy Ronald Regan was President,” Rosanne says.
5:38 – Old Crow performs “8 Dogs, 8 Banjos” on the pre-telecast before the Americana awards.
5:25 – “Weird” Al Yankovic wins the Grammy for Best Comedy Album. If we can’t all agree on Weird Al, what can we agree on?
5:11 – Rosanne Cash presents the biggest of the non-telecast country Grammy Awards.
”Carrie Underwood wins Best Country Solo Performance for “Something In The Water.”
”The Band Perry wins Best Country Duo/Group Performance for “Gentle On My Mind.”
”Glen Campbell & Songwriters win the Best Country Song Grammy for “I’m Not Gonna Miss You.”
”The Earls of Leichester win the Best Bluegrass Album Grammy for the album “The Earls of Leichester”
Rosanne Cash presenting, and Jerry Douglas accepting for the Earls of Leichester:
3:20 – Hank Williams and “The Garden Spot Programs 1950” wins for Best Historical Album. The award went to Colin Escott (Hank’s biographer) & Cheryl Pawelski, compilation producers; Michael Graves, mastering engineer.
2:50 – T Graham Brown is one of the best stories of this year’s Grammy Awards. Receiving his very first nomination for a Grammy his album “Forever Changed” is up for Best Roots Gospel Album. He showed up in what he called his “Hillbilly Bling,” showing off his shiny rings and watch, and giving credit to his sobriety for getting his career back on track.
2:45 – Glen Campbell’s family was one of the first to arrive. Glen’s “I’m Not Gonna Miss you” is up for Best Country Song.