If the first iteration of Chris Gaines wasn’t controversial enough, get ready for five (yes, five!) more Chris Gaines albums to complete the universe of the Garth Brooks sex-addicted emo pop star alter ego.
For the last couple of years I’ve been noticing it. And if you’re a fan of Garth Brooks or just a general fan of country music, you may have noticed it too. There are an inordinate amount of people in the comments sections of anything having to do with Garth Brooks asking, “Where are the bodies Garth?”
Dolly Parton will be one of the next inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. The next question is how the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame will consider country performers for induction moving forward. This moment presents a slippery slope.
Bust out the black eyeliner and get ready to party like it’s 1999, because the G-man has promised that some new, unreleased Chris Gaines material is on the way along with a re-release of the previous stuff. This is what Garth Brooks promised recently.
Jason Isbell is still riding high after hitting career marks for his recent album The Nashville Sound, which topped the Country Albums charts. But if you expect the mainstream level of success of his career to change the songwriter, or his penchant to speak out, you’re sadly mistaken.
The implosion of the rock genre, especially on radio, has made country a haven for rock stars looking to keep their careers relevant, ultimately spreading the cancer of declining careers to the country format as well. If Steven Tyler’s move to country had anything to do with inspiration or influence, you won’t hear much of it on this new record.
Move over Chris Gaines and Earl Dibble’s Jr., there’s a new alter ego in the country world, and he’s a soft-core porn semi-star sporting a mullet and playing cheesy 90’s country rock in the country music equivalent of a hair metal band. Douglas “Big Rhythm Doug” Douglason and his band Hot Country Knights is apparently a real thing, or a fake thing that’s pretending to be real
The truth is, Garth was never going to live up to the lofty expectations many were foisting upon his re-entry into the country fold. Forget the naysayers who still can’t get over his high wire act at Texas Stadium or the Chris Gaines gimmick, there was some thought that Garth may be the only one left with the star power to reignite the spark of true country music in the mainstream once again.
Where airstrikes, drone attacks, and diplomatic resolutions in recent weeks failed to weaken the resolve to the radical ISIS Islamists, the release of Garth Brooks’ first single since his 13-year retirement called “People Loving People” has apparently landed the resoluteness of ISIS a fatal blow. Reports out of northern portions of Iraq and Syria currently under ISIS control are of desertions in the thousands.
“Garth Brooks did for country music what pantyhose did for finger fucking.” This is the quote that has been attributed to Waylon Jennings that you are likely to see in much greater frequency now that Garth Brooks has come out of retirement. For some, it is the totality of their argument against Garth.The problem is there’s no verifiable records of Waylon ever saying it.
Looking to salvage whatever they can from the debacle, the local promoters have announced they have found a replacement for Brooks, and it will be another entertainer coming out of retirement to perform for the Croke Park crowd. Dark-edged alternative rocker Chris Gaines has been named as the Garth Brooks replacement.
Anyone who considers themselves a good storyteller has to be an admirer of songwriter and performer Todd Snider. Over his career, it can be argued his stories have gone on to bolster his troubadour status just as much as his songs. And anyone who’s seen Todd Snider perform a few times or more knows that Garth Brooks has been a familiar punching bag for Todd.
Oh the irony that the man whose name is on the tip of many people’s tongues as the one who brought country music to its knees and made it more about money than music, could also be the man in the best position to ultimately help save it. There’s a lot less mystery here than some would like you to believe. Here very soon, Garth will announce a new album, and plans for a subsequent arena/stadium tour in support.
Since music no longer holds any intrinsic value to the American consumer and they’d rather steal a song than have it be sold to them for less than a pack of gum, merch, MERCH is where all the money is now. Major labels manufacture merch in the textile industry’s version of puppy mills somewhere in southeast Asia. Here’s some country music T Shirts you won’t see for sale anytime soon.
So on Saturday night, I get a phone call from a friend who knows I like pop country about as much as getting a splintered board shoved up my ass, telling me that the perfume peddling Timberly McGraw is the host of Saturday Night Live. So I tune into the last half of the show […]