Dec
5

Mindy McCready Kidnaps Scotty McCreery

December 5, 2011 - By Trigger  //  News  //  17 Comments

In yet another crazy twist in the unraveling story of country star Mindy McCready, she has now been accused of kidnapping the reigning American Idol champion with a similar-sounding last name.

Scotty McCreery was last seen lip syncing at a parade Saturday morning in Nashville, when right after his performance, witnesses say he was lured into an unmarked white cargo van by a woman matching the description of Mindy McCready, offering Scotty Oreo cookies.

“It was Mindy alright,” says eyewitness Blake Frankenfurter. “Crazy gleam to her eyes, striking blonde hair, and a baby bump that looks like she could BM out a pair of twins at any moment.”

Last week after McCready made headlines for kidnapping her 5-year-old son, she revealed she was 5 months pregnant with twins.

Nashville Metro Police say they are looking for Scotty, and are giving the description as “a young white male with a striking resemblance to Mad Magazine’s mascot Alfred E. Newman, who might still be holding a dummy, non-functioning microphone.

Shorty after the abduction, Mindy McCready released a statement through her publicist.

Scotty McCreery is just so adorable and cherubic, and his last name is so similar to mine, I thought he would help ease my empty nest syndrome since CPS took my real baby boy away from me. Don’t you worry about Scotty! He is fine! I will be the best mommy he’s ever had, and I will love him and pet him like he’s my very own!

Police have yet to issue an Amber alert for Scotty, but his family and manager have warned if Scotty is away from his lip sync equipment for too long, he might go in to shock. Police say Mindy could have taken Scotty to a Chuck E’ Cheese, Scotty’s favorite restaurant. Experts say Scotty may not even know he’s been kidnapped.

“Since his American Idol win, his life has been so micro-managed and his free will so compromised, he may not know better than to follow all of Mindy’s orders,” explains child psychologist Ashton Olson. “Scotty may even sympathize with his captor, which is common, but may even be more common if Scotty can identify with Mindy as a product of the stilted entertainment business.”

Mindy McCready’s unborn fetus twins were unavailable for comment.

17 Comments to “Mindy McCready Kidnaps Scotty McCreery”

  • Zing!

       2 likes

  • What, me worry?

       0 likes

  • Aw, poor Mindy…. you had me going!!! lmao Did you see her on “I Survived?” She really did have a guy beat her beyond recognition for breaking up with her…she barely did survive. Maybe it’s her turn to go lurking to abuse men, eh?

       0 likes

  • oh if it were only true, maybe we could take Scottys’ slots and fill them with possessed by Paul James, or Willie Tea and show America that….. oh silly me thats not gonna happen. Rant aborted.

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  • totally tasteless of showing this photo, and a new low for you triggerman, just like M. lambert, you have no respect for women, Mindy has been through hell, and made some mistakes, way to go kicking someone in the gut, when they are down.. I wondered, if this were to happen to some one in your family, how you would have taken this joke, if some one else had made it.

       1 likes

    • Miranda Lambert has no respect for women? Hmmm…sounds weird, but ok.

      If Mindy was part of my family, I would have disowned her by now. I don’t subscribe to the camp that makes victims out of criminals. We all have a sob story, and are all held responsible for our own actions. You can fuck up all you want, but when you voluntarily bring kids in the world and fuck up for them, that’s when you rocket to the top of my shit list. But this wasn’t meant to be hurtful. It was meant to be funny. Laugh.

      And I wouldn’t be so quick to judge my respect level for women.

         0 likes

  • The way you insulted her, you know what i was talking about, and i wonder if that would happen to someone you know, how funny would this all be.

       2 likes

    • Shawn,

      You have the sense for sarcasm of a Labrador. You know this article was written in jest, right? That I didn’t try to interview Mindy’s unborn fetus twins?

         0 likes

      • Shawn you’ll be one of the signers of petitions in support of the inevitable laws that will one day take away our right to free speech because someone might get offended. Shawn get down off your high horse, take the chip off your shoulder watch this video, think about what it says. If you still don’t like SCM, then use your American liberty and vote with your feet and stop reading what Triggerman has to say. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cycXuYzmzNg

           0 likes

        • Trig i think you’ll love this

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  • Again what if that had been someone you knew? So you like to joke about a woman who is having a custody battle, with her abusive boyfriend, and her allegedly abusive mom, no offense if you want to make jokes try it about the sad state of country music, that is what to joke about, not someone’s personal tragic story trig, that is not cool at all.
    Honestly, there are other things to make fun of than a sad tragedy like this. That’s the problem with this country, people make fun of such tragedies, and think it is a joke, ask her son if he thinks this is funny.
    And in another instance do you remember when Howard Stern made fun of Selena getting shot? Where do you draw the line? Somethings are not meant to be made fun of.

       1 likes

  • Yeah, gotta agree u’ve sent pretty low bar for journalism and show respect for no one.
    But who cares about integrity and character right? You got yourself a headline and such a cute little story. Fantasize much? I’ll not the name triggerman for recall not to read…names real cute too, cause you apparently perceive yourself to be a real hot-shot. Disgusting.

       1 likes

    • This is journalism? It looks like clear satire to me.

      And I have respect for no one? Do you know me?

         0 likes

  • correction above shd read u set the bar and I’ll note the name…

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  • Holy Balls you Two( bella and shawn) !!!! I mean really. Really !!!! Did you write letters to Jay Leno when he takes advantage of Kim Kardashian or Tiger Woods and Elan and their incidents for monologue jokes?? And since when has this become a site for journalism. It was easy for me to recognize from the first time i came here that this was a site to learn about new music and share opinions with others of a like mind. Apparently you are so busy thrusting your expectations and criteria on others you have become blind to free speech. If you want quality journalism try NPR, The Economist or Gwen Ifill on PBS. I dont agree with every thing that Trig says but i have learned of many great acts like Willie Tea and the Boomswagglers. Some others i haven’t liked as much. If you dont have a sense of humor you are in the wrong place. Parting advice: Lighten the F up, you two are a drag.

       0 likes

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