Um, Kane Brown Loves What “Like Country Music”?

If Kane Brown loves his woman like he loves country music as he says in his new song, that means he’s sleeping with her sister and gave them both a case of chlamydia that he contracted from some floozie he picked up in a bar. It means Kane Brown is engaged in an abusive relationship and someone needs to slap a restraining order on the situation. “Toxic” to say the least.

Did you know this dude has his own cereal now. Kane Krunch? I’d rather eat a bowl of Post Toasties that Travis Tritt took a wicked piss in. Having your mug on this box is like the antithesis of Wheaties. On the back is a maze where you help Kane Brown find his way home after he gets lost on his own 30 acres.

In all seriousness though, Kane Brown has a massive radio hit on his hands with his new song. This thing has been the most added track on country radio for two weeks straight, and it’s already knocking on the door of the Top 20. If anything, they’re going to need to slow the song down, or Kane’s summer smash is going to peak by Memorial Day.

“Like I Love Country Music” is the latest installment of a tried and true way to get country radio to play your stuff: name drop radio and promote the format in the song itself. Programmers at Cumulus and iHeart heard the the line, “You turn me on as much as I turn on my radio” and immediately threw it in the hourly rotation. Hey, they’re circling the drain, and they’ll take whatever shout outs they can get.

Similarly, “Like I Love Country Music” predictably name drops hot retro 90s country stars like Alan Jackson, Brooks & Dunn, and even weaves in the names of Willie Nelson, George Jones, and Johnny and June (Cash). Ronnie Dunn even sings a little line. I’d love to be a fly on the wall when they asked Alan Jackson if he’d contribute something to this. But of course, it’s easy to drop a name, but Kane Brown doesn’t work any of the paramount influence of these country greats into this song.

What makes “Like I Love Country Music” sort of an interesting discussion point, and difficult to cast off completely, is the fact that there is an ample amount of steel guitar and fiddle in the song. This is counteracted by the 808 beats, and the overall bad idea behind the premise for the song itself. But sonically, it really is a mixed bag, like a new radio song and a classic country song smashed together.

Look, Kane Brown has always participated in some of these “more country” moments in his career. Though you would never put a song like this above something like Carly Pearce’s recent #1 with Ashley McBryde, “Never Wanted to Be That Girl,” a song that actually has steel and fiddle that is shooting up the charts at least should give us some bit of pause before completely shitting on it.

And hey, maybe some Kane Brown fans and country radio listeners will hear the names of Alan Jackson and Brooks & Dunn, and dig for their music. After all, if you think the resurgence of interest in 90s country is being fueled solely off the nostalgia of 40-somethings, you’re not paying attention. Younger audiences are also participating as they listen to the music of their parents, and are trying to find something with a bit more meaning than today’s “country” selections.

No doubt, Kane Brown and his co-writers Matt Mcginn, Jordan Mark Schmidt, and Taylor Delmar Phillips are trying to piggy back off this phenomenon with “Like I Love Country Music,” adding just enough elements to give it a retro vibe, while also attempting to appeal to contemporary listeners and the mainstream radio format.

But ultimately, even if you’ve poured yourself the most tasty bowl of cereal, mixing it with piss (from Travis Tritt or anyone else) is going discourage distinguishing consumers from partaking. In fact, many fans of Alan Jackson and Brooks & Dunn would rather pipe up a straight up pop record record than listen to a pop country song that tries to incorporate so many contemporary pop elements into it.

Though you have to begrudgingly give a modicum of credit to Kane Brown for incorporating actual country instrumentation into this track, the premise of this song is just off, and incredibly transparent, which is all the more reason to believe this will be a massive and ubiquitous summer smash heading straight to #1.

1 1/2 Guns DOWN (3/10)

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